Need help with AppStore Description!!!!

WTDeveloper

Hey everyone,
my first game "Sheep Count" is now for 3 Weeks on the AppStore...
I got bad reviews for my description....
Because i'm german i need your help to help me writing a new description!!!!
Can anyone help me???
Game:
http://itunes.apple.com/us/app/sheep-count/id507884705?l=de&ls=1&mt=8

WTDeveloper

MotherHoose

bump

WTDeveloper

thanks motherhoose,
i'm making a description right now..
i will post it later and please correct me if there are mistakes..
i looked on the description of angry birds to get inspiration...

WTDeveloper

WTDeveloper

So here it is!!!

Do you have enough skill to help the sheeps ??? 


The lifes of the sheeps are in your hand. Use your skill to save them! Another challenge is, to collect the coins,during you save the sheeps! Sheep Count is a challenging, physic-based game, which is very addictive!

When you want to collect more coins in one game, go to the shop ,buy Power-Ups and use they during the game to collect more coins!!!
FEATURES


• 3 amazing modes (Normal,Hardcore and all Coins)


• Regular free updates!!


• Easy Touch Controls


• Black and white sheeps!


• Wonderful family adventure!
• Beautiful graphics!

• A great shop to buy Power-Ups!!!
• 3 useful Power-Ups!!!


Review:
"Nice and simple - A nice and simple game, that my 4 year old really enjoyed and kept coming back to play."

Become Sheep Count Fan on Facebook:

http://www.facebook.com/SheepCountGame

simo103

@WTDeveloper
would suggest:

Help .... the sheep need your skills ... 

 their lives are in your hand. Only your gaming abilities can save them! Sheep Count is a challenging, addictive, physic-based game, which is a lot of fun!

Use the in-game coins to purchase POWER-UPS from the game store to super charge your gameplay! Hurry the sheep are counting on you!

then the rest is fine. Hope that helps. Just so you know:

Sheep is singular and plural ie: sheep is one sheep, sheep is ten sheep (no sheeps)
Lives (not lifes)

WTDeveloper

thanks simon 103